I'm motivated to reply mostly by a desire to forcefully (but respectfully) disagree with one piece of advice you've received here. Don't be cynical--and certainly don't be overtly cynical.
There are practical and principled reasons. First the practical: I hope you will not be offended--I do not know you after all--when I say that probably you are not Lebron James. Which is to say, you probably are not recognized as one of the top 2 or 3 in your profession in a highly profitable business. You simply don't have the leverage of a professional athlete. And that means you can't afford to be perceived as crass and selfish.
Don't misunderstand me. I realize that these times are different from a few decades ago. I know companies will lay off long-time, loyal employees without hesitation. I know most employees will gladly leave a company they've been happy at for a little more money. Still, if you act in a cynical way, you'll acquire that reputation--and your message makes you seem anything but cynical.
That gets to the "principled" part. Your loyalty to colleagues is great. It's harder to be loyal to a faceless institution, but there's nothing wrong with that either.
Still, my recommendations would not differ much from that other poster's. Express your sincere regret, to colleagues and bosses. Thank people for the opportunities they've offered you. Explain the circumstances so that they can understand that you're not playing them or deceiving them. Then give them notice--if they need more than 2 weeks to help them replace you, work with them--and then move on to this opportunity that's too good to pass over.
Let me also add that even though you're the "trailing spouse" in this instance, that doesn't mean that you can't excel in your new context. I'm aware of a couple of instances--though this is in academia--where trailing spouses ended up being the more successful. It's not a contest; I'm just pointing out that this could end up being a great opportunity for you as well, as long as you go into it determined to make the most of it.
Best of Luck.
Jim Austin, Editor